Gathering the Courage to Show up More Authentically
Waiting in the Wings
Have you ever noticed yourself relying on unhelpful patterns and habits ingrained from childhood when in reality, a completely different energy and action is called for?
Photo by Julian Hanslmaier on Unsplash
I ask the question because it feels appropriate to share that this feels like something I’ve been noticing about myself over the last months. To share a bit from my own life, I’ve been “waiting in the wings,” so to speak, to start a coaching practice to support women who are struggling with their health and are looking for the courage and support to change something that they know it’s really time for.
Why have I been waiting in the wings, you ask? Because it’s been my habit to be watchful, to be careful, to not be too loud, not to offend, not to stand out. Without going too deeply into the past, suffice it to say that being able to identify that this is what’s going on has been enlightening and empowering in giving me back my freedom and ability to choose differently.
Building Up My Courage to Change
So what choosing something different has looked like for me has been surrounding myself with amazing, supportive people who are choosing to walk a similar entrepreneurial path (I belong to a few close-knit groups), hiring myself a 1:1 business coach because I know myself and my needs well, and continuing my own personal healing work with individual practices and with the support of others as well. Heck, I even got a job, to support both my actual family and my baby business financially. I’m thinking of this job as being a foundation where I can use my strengths to earn money to nourish myself and my baby practice as I flesh out how I will support other women in their own growth and on their own healing path through my 1:1 coaching business.
My Growth Edge Feels Uncomfortable
And I do all of this in service of being able to do the hard and uncomfortable things to finally get my coaching practice started. Introducing myself at business meet-ups where I don’t know anyone — simply, clearly, and without apology. Reaching out to women I know as part of my market research to get started in getting clearer on what are the needs of the women I already have around me.
So going back to the unhelpful pattern I’ve noticed in myself — this has really come from seeing others mirror this back for me. Sometimes we really just can’t do things alone! I’ll notice someone else speaking about apologizing for being who they are, and it feels like it could be me. Or one of my group mates notices that what I call filtering (or needing to manage other people’s reactions to me being myself) is a repeated theme for me that I struggle with. Naming it helps to strip it of its power — that reticence, hesitation, or holding back that happens out of fear, previous negative experiences. Awareness of the way these ingrained responses of shrinking or collapsing show up in my life, I realize they are simply “bad habits” and that I can instead stand in my power and choose differently.
Would you like to connect for a market research interview with me?
So in line with that, I’m asking for your help. I have a goal of doing 10 market research interviews over the months of March and April.
I’d love to connect with 10 women who are between the ages of 30–60 and are teachers, nurses, and have the tendency to overgive, put other people first, and want to show up more fully as themselves. If you or someone in your world fits this description and would be willing to talk to me, I’d be over the moon.
I’d like to invite them to do a market research interview with me where I get to pick their brain and ask them questions about their experience around stress around work, health, family, etc as they see it, and in exchange, I’m offering 30 minutes complimentary coaching around anything that comes up in conversation or something that they already have in mind.
Do you know anyone who fits that description? Please comment and let me know if that’s you or someone you know and you’d be willing to help out.